Summer Lov'n

Today is officially the first day of the Fall season and that means a big good-bye to summer 2010! And although I am more than happy to leave behind the humidity, the burning seatbelt buckle, and unflattering swimsuit, summers always seem to bring a renewing effect -- projects get done, vacations, down-time (this is mostly from our school years), big movie releases, the infamous summer love that can occasionally (or frequently) come your way. A lot happens in summer.

Movie: INCEPTION

Among the horrible sequels of Iron Man and Sex and the City came a movie whose enticing and original premises of implanting ideas within the human mind drew me in immediately. Inception was everything a summer movie should be -- a visually stunning, intectually stimulating thriller with characters you root for and a storyline complex enough to keep you debating after the credits role.

Book: THE GIRL WITH THE DRAGON TATTOO -- This trilogy by the late Stieg Larsson of Sweden has been sweeping the world with millions of books sold, one Swedish movie version, and an English movie currently filming. Who wouldn't be intrigued? And for good reason because I could not put this book down. I don't know if it was the compelling characters of Mikeal Blomvist and Lisbeth Salander (who has been called the new feminist hero of the decade), the edgy and dark subject matter that blows any fluffy romance off its rocker (a warning to sensitive readers -- there is some disturbing content), or the great storyline mystery that keeps you guessing (no skimming pages or skipping boring chapters). Oh, and P.S. -- if you like the book, the Swedish movie version is available which I would highly recommend.

Project Finished: I have caught up on my scrapbooking of newspaper articles and movie ticket stubs from the last 3 years and have successfully created my own recipe book to put the infinate number of recipes I've collected and thrown carelessly into a shoe box. No more!

Fear Conquered: In my ever-evolving quest to conquer my anxiety of driving in populated areas, I have successfully driven almost the whole length of Interstate 355 --even with the constructions that I'm betting will be completed when the Apocalypse occurs.

Makeup Trick Learned: For all the pale faces out there, I learned that putting a bit (bit is the key word here) of blush across the hairline at the top of the forehead does give you a sun-kissed, bright face. Don't knock it til you try it! And don't use a dark blush....lighter is better.

Beverage: Sparkling Water -- I found this treasure by accident when I thought I had bought plain bottled water. Refreshing and without the sugar and heavy syrup of soda.

Go-To Summer T-Shirt for Lazy Days: It was all Blackhawks love since they won the World Cup and a bright red shirt with the mascot in front was this summers perfect tee.

Television Show: GLEE -- Summer television is not my thing as reality television gets dumber and many of the shows worth watching are on hiatus til fall. However, I was pushed to watch Glee by a friend and through my stalling and procrastinating I finally did.....and was hooked from the 1st episode. I'm a Gleek and proud of it!

Music: GLEE SOUNDTRACKS -- See above....they go hand-in-hand. For those of you who are just getting into Glee, I recommend the wonderful mash-up songs of Halo/Sunshine and It's My Life/Confessions and of course the song that started it all Don't Stop Believing.

Place to Go: A Cubs Rooftop game -- Yes, it is a bit pricey but it is an experience that every Cubs fan should have. The one price you pay includes the game, all food (better than any food you will find inside the park), and all drinks, including alcohol. Still not convinced? With 3 floors to choose from (one indoor, one partial indoor, and the rooftop with stadium seating), it fits for everyone's preferences. It is never crowded inside and there's no fighting the 40,000 people trying to squeeze their way out of the exits after the game. The best part? The bathrooms! And if you've been to the bathrooms at Wrigley, you will understand this immediately.

New Drinking Haven: Marina Bars -- the down-to-earth feel, hanging lantern lights (or tiki torches), and great summer night weather make drinking by the lake the comforting place to be. Add some great music and I'm there!

New Guilty Pleasure: Pedicures -- I've been avoiding them as I believed my tickilish feet would result in some poor girl's broken nose. I'm so glad I was wrong.

What I Learned This Summer: To let go -- There are people and things that were only meant to be in our lives for a little while....to help us grow and get us to the next part of our journey. And it wasn't meant to last forever, even if we wanted it to. Keep moving forward and remember those things as great memories. It may not make sense now but looking back later in life, connect the dots and realize that it happened for a reason.

Goodbye Summer 2010. Thanks for the memories. :)

Stephanie

Everything I Need To Learn, I Learned From Andre Dawson

I've been a Cubs fan all my life and being a fan of sports, I can say it is easy to remember the bad moments. I'm sure every Cubs fan can remember the Sammy Sosa "cork-in-the bat" scandal, the Kyle Farnsworth caught-sleeping-in-the-dug-out incident, the Milton Bradley whine-a-thon of last year, and more recently Carlos Zambrano's berating his entire team and getting suspended. It makes you wonder if all baseball players have become classless, overpaid athlethes whose sportmanship abilities have all but flown out the window.

Enter Andre Dawson, who was just inducted into the Baseball Hall of Fame this past week. Not only was he a respectful and classy guy, but his message was stuff that works not only in the game of baseball but in life as well. I had to share!

"Love the game and it will love you back." -- Apply this to life: Love life and it will love you back. Simple right? Putting it in baseball terms makes it all the sweeter.

If One Door Closes, Find Another One -- When Andre Dawson's contract was up in Montreal, they did not renew it and no other team seemed too interested. Instead of continuing to face a closed door, Andre Dawson wanted to play for the Cubs, so he sent a blank and signed contract to the Cubs manager in Chicago, said this is the team he wanted to play for and he didn't care what number they put down for his salary. This is where he wanted to play. The Cubs signed him and he became one of the most beloved Cubs players ever at Wrigley Field.

Show Thanks -- Cubs fans made a ritual of bowing to Andre Dawson as he ran out onto the field at Wrigley. Andre has since said there are no fans as great as Cub fans and on his last home game, he in turn bowed to them.

You Always Have a Choice -- Andre mentioned briefly about his disappointment in the use of steriods that has plagued the Major League Baseball teams and caused numerous scandals. It is one of the greatest gifts we have -- the power of choice.

Play Hard. Be Thankful. Be Respectful. Love the Game and It Will Love You Back.

Living In Low Gear

I am sooooo bad at keeping this thing up.....and the thing is...I love to blog and read other blogs! But at times, especially lately, I feel I have nothing to contribute to the blog-reading world. Life has been a bit stagnant for me since I have graduated college. I am currently unemployed, single, and living with my parents. The one thing I owned that was truly mine (my beloved 1998 Hyundai Accent car) unfortunately met its maker last November so I have also been driving my mom's car. I feel like I own nothing in my own life. And plus, living at home means living in the middle of a small town where your high school friends have moved on to bigger and better places and your college friends live hours away, so the loneliness gets to me sometimes. Sorry, just laying it all out there -- what are personal blogs for right?

I am determined not to let the depression sink too far into my mind and heart like I let it a few years ago where it took a fair amount of counseling sessions to bring me out of it. I just wish I could clear my head of all this doubt and anxiety and feel at ease....balanced....happy. I wish I could regain an apetite for living my life. Embracing it. Loving it. Actively pursuing it and fulfilling it. Kicking it into high gear instead of settling for low gear the whole time. That's how I feel now -- puttering along with no clue as to where I am. But how do I do this? Something needs to change....I need to change. I don't know. Wow, it is late!! And I gotta get up in the morn. I promise my blogs will get better so don't count me out if this one is a downer and hopefully I can blog sooner this time than later. Take care!

The Must-Read Book -- "Devil in the White City"

Hey ya'll, I haven't blogged in such a long time! This is something I'm vowing to change. With school and work being so hectic as I near the end of my Masters program, it has been hard for me to find time to do something leisurely that I love -- reading! My reading list has been piling and piling. And in order for me to truly remember the contents of a book, I have to read it twice....so the reading list is twice as long! Haha. But I have usually switched on and off reading the "cheap entertainment" books to books with more depth. So after I attempted the first "Twilight" book (which I thoroughly did not like), I needed something to really intrigue me. I had my mother pick my next book from my enormous pile which would be The Devil in the White City by Eric Larson.

This non-fiction book, set up in novel style, revolves around two true stories with little historial sub-stories mixed in surrounding the creating, planning, executing, and aftermath of the World's Fair Exposition of Chicago in 1893 (White City) and the story of an owner of a World's Fair Hotel who became known as the first American Serial Killer H.H. Holmes (the Devil). I will admit that it gets off to a slow start but as the characters and fair start to evolve, you as a reader get pulled in to the history, stories, and people surrounding a year that changed Chicago forever. You invest in these characters, root for them. And it's all true...the places, the people, the events. They lived and breathed and transformed Chicago to start its journey on becoming the great city that it is. In fact, you can still see reminants of the fair...just tour the Museum of Science and Industry or the Art Institute...both built for the fair and continuing to be visited and admired today. It made me want to be there and immerse myself in that excitement (I think had Chicago won the Olympic bid, we would have experienced a similar excitement). But I'm satisfied knowing there are authors like Larson who bring us as close to the fair as possible through through the written word. Pick it up and give it a read!

P.S. If you have read it and are as interested as I am, there are "Devil in the White City" tours available in Chicago. There are a few out there so research (some focus on the architecture and others focus on the H.H. Holmes murders).

And That's How I Fell in Love With Zombies

This last Monday, I went to downtown Naperville, IL (a small pleasantville-like community where it actually feels safe to walk around at night) with a friend to an author reading at a local bookstore. I had never heard of the author but figured it was something new and a nice night to walk around town. The author was Carrie Ryan, author of "The Forest of Hands and Feet" and a sequel book called "The Dead-Tossed Waves." Both books are based on post-apocalytic worlds where a contained society exists within barracaded walls and zombies exists outside the walls. This books seems to be building a following and has been recently added to the New York Times Bestseller list.

I've never been to an author reading before so I wasn't sure what to expect. But as soon as Carrie Ryan began speaking, I immediately liked her. She talked about how scared she was of scary movies until she was forced to go to see the "Dawn of the Dead" remake with her boyfriend and fell in love with zombies. Her passion for writing continued and even after going through everything that law school makes you go through, she knew that a career in law wasn't for her. So she set out to write with a 10 year plan....if she didn't make it happen in 10 years, she would give it up. However, her writing found an audience and there she was tonight...doing what she loved and answering questions -- most of them about zombies. The one thing that really made me liked her was the fact that even though she went to law school and got a degree, once she knew that law wasn't for her, she allowed herself to change her course....it would be hard not to feel obligated to follow the original plan. But she knew what her passion was and went with it and you could tell she was happy....that she was proud of her work and loved what she had done and what she will do (she's in the revision process of her third book). Needless to say, I bought her first book. She sold me.

And We Raise Our Glass

In the last ten years or so, I have been to countless weddings, been part of two wedding parties, and will be part of two more this year. The weddings are as unique as the couples that have them. I love weddings. It's a celebration of love that is purposefully designed to reflect the two people that it's bringing together. And seeing two people at their happiest makes me happy. But this post is about the wedding experiences from the guest's point-of-view (well, in this case, my point of view) and the little tidbits and memories that have been my favorite through my wedding-attending days. Some are cherishable, some are sad, some are bizarre, and others are clever. Here's a list of some of the memorable wedding tidbits:



1. The Memorable Pastor -- For most wedding ceremonies, the pastor (or priest or other dude) will recite verses and conduct a sermon. However, at one wedding I went to, the pastor personalized and focused his entire sermon on the guy and girl getting married. He used stories that they had told him, talked about their hobbies and passions and future plans. He used quotes from them about what they loved about each other and intertwined those quotes into the sermon. It was so personal, so beautiful, and so sincere that even after the sermon was done, I wanted to hear more.



2. The Memory Candle -- At one wedding, the couple had an "In Memory" candle at the back of the church by the guest book. The candle was engraved with all the names of loved one who had passed away. It was something so small but to me was such a statement -- "we know you can't be here but you are not forgotton."



3. The Backyard -- This wedding will stand out as one of the more non-traditional weddings. It was a country backyard wedding complete with: a random dog wondering the aisles, an uncle who showed up with no shirt, another couple sucking each other's faces while waiting for it to start, and an interruption of the wedding vows by a group of 50 or so bikers driving by whose motorcycles were so loud, we couldn't hear, well, anything.

4. The Dream Wedding -- The bride of this wedding was her own master wedding planner. She had every minute planned, every detail down, and no flower petal out of place. I had never seen a wedding so meticulously planned as this one. After over a year of her life invested into this one day, it was so fun to see her revel in it. Oh, and if you are wondering if this dream wedding came with a horse-drawn carriage?...yes, yes it did.

5. The Fire Truck -- This couple met while working for the Fire Deptment so it was only fitting to them that they would leave the church and climb up on a fire truck to take them to their reception. The wedding cake had a fire truck at the top with ladders connecting each teir and the bride herself had a white dress lined with navy blue -- to commerate the colors of the fire dept. Many might say "tacky" but these two people were paying homage to the passion that brought them together and they continue to share.

6. CD Wedding Favors -- At one wedding, the favors we received were copies of a CD where the bride and groom burnt some of their favorite songs played at the wedding. So very clever!

7. "I Loved Her First" song -- This beautiful father/daughter dance song can still make me cry but hearing it while watching a father and daughter dance to it? Priceless.

8. The Unwedding -- As I was on my way to a small wedding of a friend who was hosting it in her own backyard, I got a call saying that just an hour before the wedding, the groom-to-be called it off. Instead of wanting people to leave, the former bride asked that we still come and just be with her. She was calm and non-emotional -- as I think she was still in shock -- and we came and talked with her at what would have been the reception tables and ate the food that had been catered in and paid for. The part of that afternoon that stood out to me was when she refused to open the fridge where her wedding cake lay untouched. It was a sad moment.

9. The Mansion -- This wedding was held in a gorgeous old mansion. Did I mention it was suposedly haunted? That fact alone would put it on this list! This place beat any reception hall in beauty and elegance. I would go back to this place anyday!

10. The Champagne -- I had to finish out this list by mentioning my first wedding ever. I was 8 and it was the first event where I really did "dance like nobody's watching." My brother did cartwheels across the dance floor and since we couldn't have this odd drink called "champagne" that the adults got to have, we made our own -- we mixed Coke and Sprite and called it the same thing. We even made a toast with it. Unforgettable.

Conan O'Brien: Long May You Run

I'm a fan of late night talk shows and a big fan of Conan O'Brien. After a busy day, Conan with his self-deprecating humor and whit, always made me smile and laugh (out loud, might I add -- has anyone seen his skit -- In the Year 3000?) I was overjoyed after learning he would be taking over The Tonight Show after Leno stepped down. And unless you have been living under a rock, I'm sure you heard or saw the ongoing dispute among Conan, Jay Leno, and NBC Studios. For those of you who are under-rock dwellers (or just don't care about pop culture), I will catch you up.

Jay Leno left the Tonight Show to pursue his own television show that would air before The Tonight Show, which would be hosted by Conan O'Brien. The Jay Leno show was cancelled due to poor ratings and NBC decided to offer Leno back The Tonight Show and move Conan back to his original spot. Conan refused and the ongoing fued was captured through the television with verbal jabs at each other on their own shows as well as from other hosts (like David Letterman and Jimmy Kimmel). Actors/guest stars lined up behind Conan to support him and he stood his ground against NBC. Finally, last week, both announced a deal. Conan O'Brien would leave The Tonight Show and receive $33 million dollars out of the total payout of $45 million. The remaineder would be split among his producers and writers of the show. So on Friday, January 22nd, Conan made his last appearance on NBC as a talk show.

I know stereotypes are made about people and their professions, and I confess that I can tend to make unknown claims too. I tend to think that stand-up comedians or people who make humor their career only know how to make people laugh --when it comes to the serious stuff, they lack emotion and poise. But I could not have been more wrong when Conan took the last part of his show to completely surprise me with his emotional and graceful goodbye (including a perfect song performed by Neil Young -- "Long May You Run":

"Before we end this rodeo, a few things need to be said. There has been a lot of speculation in the press about what I legally can and can't say about NBC. To set the record straight, tonight I am allowed to say anything I want. And what I want to say is this: between my time at Saturday Night Live, the Late Night show, and my brief run here on The Tonight Show, I have worked with NBC for over twenty years. "Yes, we have our differences right now and yes, we're going to go our separate ways. But this company has been my home for most of my adult life. I am enormously proud of the work we have done together, and I want to thank NBC for making it all possible.

Walking away from The Tonight Show is the hardest thing I have ever had to do. Making this choice has been enormously difficult. This is the best job in the world, I absolutely love doing it, and I have the best staff and crew in the history of the medium. But despite this sense of loss, I really feel this should be a happy moment. Every comedian dreams of hosting The Tonight Show and, for seven months, I got to. I did it my way, with people I love, and I do not regret a second. I've had more good fortune than anyone I know and if our next gig is doing a show in a 7-Eleven parking lot, we'll find a way to make it fun.

And finally, I have to say something to our fans. The massive outpouring of support and passion from so many people has been overwhelming. The rallies, the signs, all the goofy, outrageous creativity on the internet, and the fact that people have traveled long distances and camped out all night in the pouring rain to be in our audience, made a sad situation joyous and inspirational. To all the people watching, I can never thank you enough for your kindness to me and I'll think about it for the rest of my life. All I ask of you is one thing: please don't be cynical. I hate cynicism — it's my least favorite quality and it doesn't lead anywhere.

"Nobody in life gets exactly what they thought they were going to get. But if you work really hard and you're kind, amazing things will happen. "

Conan, I will always be a fan. I know great things are in store for you. Stay humble. Stay cheerful. Stay passionate. Long May You Run.

Twenty Ten or Two Thousand Ten

Wow! 2009 has come and gone and now we are entering a new decade! It was hard for me to comprehend all that has happened in 10 short years......in my own life and our society. It may not even seem like much until you really think about it. We had the closest presidental race in history between Bush and Gore (remember that??) and since have had two other presidential elections. We went through some great tragedies like September 11th, the Challenger exploding in 2003, the Tsumani that left 200,000 dead, Hurricane Katrina, a war that has been going on for almost 7 years, and most recently, a recession that has affected everyone (if you haven't been affected directly, I'm sure you can name someone that has).

Look at your own life now. What has happened in the last 10 years? Are you where you imagined yourself to be? I examined the last ten years and was ultimately surprised by the changes and experiences I have had. I graduated from middle school, high school, college, and will be finishing my Masters Degree this May. That equals A LOT OF SCHOOL and it will be a big change after May to not have classes at all. I had the experience of teaching a class and chaperoning the same high school field trips that I once took. I've been to an island, Vegas, the Rockies, an abandoned isane asylum, and explored the downtown city of Chicago so far. I've seen countless weddings, made and lost friends, had heartbreaks, have seen wonderful expansions to my family and witnessed part of my family torn apart. I've welcomed the birth of two little cousins and said goodbye to my grandpa. I have received and parted with my first and only car I have owned thus far. I watched as 6 of the 7 Harry Potter books were transformed onscreen and the truly amazing invention of the Ipod changed the way I listened to music. I found priorities, changed some values that I had previously held and gained a bit of wisdom along the way. Let's hope the next ten years only get better!
Stephanie

P.S. I do plan on blogging a lot more than I did in 2010
P.S.S. The reason for the title: There is this massive debate among grammer-correct-people about whether we should pronounce 2010 as Twenty-Ten or Two Thousand Ten.......and my answer is........whichever one tickles your fancy. I won't correct you if you say either one and I hope that this debate among um....grammatical experts can be resolved peacefully. Thanks.

Conquering the Adult Playground of America

Many of you know that I recently took a trip to Las Vegas at the beginning of July. Me and two friends from college (let's call them Sasha and Ivy because those were the fake names we donned while there....mine was Harley in case you were curious) packed up and flew out for five days. I would be lying if I said I wasn't nervous. It was a new place after all and nicknamed "sin city" for a reason -- an adult playground where most anything goes and is accepted behavior. But, I can say with confidence that I had an amazing time, experienced things that I'll never forget, and would love to go back again someday. Before I get into the details, was there anything that happened in Vegas that stayed in Vegas? Yes. It was wonderful and exciting and no regrets and that is what I will say about that.

Being in our early twenties, the one thing we wanted to experience was the nightclub scene and experience we did.....EVERY night. We went to small clubs and huge clubs and clubs with lounging couches and even had a V.I.P. experience on our last night there at the Playboy Club at the Palms Hotel. I met so many different kinds of people from all over the world. We were stuck on a double-decker bus with two native (and handsome-as-hell) French men who taught us a bit of french, partied with two girls from England whose word for drunk was "pissed", a hilarious cab driver from Virginia and two older ladies from New Hampshire who we met in the pool with their big hats and jewelry who officially labeled themselves our "Vegas grandmas" and were two of the funniest and most genuine people I have met. Oh....and the MEN in Vegas........they are something else......I swear. One man offered to be our pimps and help us make money, I had a man bluntly say this exact phrase to me -- "You have beautiful eyes. Want to f*** in the elevator?" When I politely declined his offer, he counteroffered with "How about a hand job? Or a feel?" Another man I danced with at the club told me I made him hot and he wanted to "marinate" me if I'd come by his hotel room.....no joke...marinate? Like you marinate meat before you cook it? Had to chuckle at that one so good thing it was loud and dark in the club.

You need to come to Vegas with an open mind and heart and not take anything too seriously. It's about coming to the party and making it fun. You meet some doozies and may have an offensive remark thrown your way once in a while and if you let it get to you, you will have a miserable time. But if you can throw the remark back in a whitty, humorous way or brush it off or laugh it down, then you will fit in just fine. For every gross or preverted person you might meet, there are 10 or 20 good people you will run into. Well, this is Part I of three blogs I will be doing about Vegas. There's so many subjects to talk about, it hard to fit them in to one blog. My next blog will talk about being a girl in Vegas because being a girl in Vegas is GREAT and being a guy in Vegas SUCKS. I'll tell you why next time!
Later dayz,
Steph

Having a Passion for Hauntings

So, me and a very good friend of mine Emily recently took a trip down to Decatur, IL to attend the Lucky 13 Haunting Conference. It is basically a gathering of paranormal groups, investigators, and paranormal fans like me and Em who come together and talk about the paranormal. They had different speakers on many different subjects (one of them sex...go figure!) and lots of stories to tell. We were unable to get onto any of the sold out haunting tours that were happening, but it was still something to experience. Best of all, I was able to meet with Troy Taylor. He's like the king of paranormal. He's traveled all over the country holding investigations and has written over 60 books on the subect. And to my deligtful surprise, he is one of the most down-to-earth and coolest people to talk to. By coincidence, he was staying in the same hotel as us and came into the bar where we chatted a bit. I met so many different paranormal groups..ordinary people/friends who get together and check out haunted places. I met the owner of the Bartonville insane asylum that me and Em toured together back in November. We bounced back and forth our own stories of our haunted experiences and it was excited to have people who have a passion for this as much (and sometimes more!) than I do. I've loved learning about hauntings since I was a kid in front of the television watching "Unsolved Mysteries" while others were tuning into "Party of Five." To do this for a living would be such an experience -- to travel and meet people and hear their stories and try to get them some validation. We had groups with techology galore, others with matching T-shirts, and little ole me and Em, who probably looked outta place, but we soon got comfortable with the atmosphere. There was one other highlight of our weekend and that was the reading we signed up for with the famed psychic Ken Berg. Though I will not say what he told Em (in case she'd rather keep that to herself), I will share some things he saw for me:


1. I will be taking an exciting trip within the next two months and will have a great time

2. There is a change of residence within the next year

3. I will be getting more responsibility at my job but I will not hold that job or stay on that job path by the next year

4. No sudden deaths or health problems within my family for the next year.

5. I will be a mom someday -- he is saying 3 kids

6. I have a fear of rejection

7. A relationship dynamic will change within the next three months

8. I really hold back with men and should put myself out there more. The results will be good if I do.

I think that was the gist of it. I was kinda unprepared because he does a tarot card reading and then you can ask him questions. I would like to do it again and have questions prepared. I would like to learn more about what areas he thinks I would be good at with a career (since I'm stuck on that right now). I know maybe I shouldn't rely on a psychic to find that out but another opinion wouldn't hurt. He had some good insights with not only me but on Em as well. Wouldn't mind doing it again sometime. He's back in October. :)

I've attached a couple articles that explains more about the various speakers and activities that happened over the weekend. He does a really good job at reporting the details of the events and tells it better and with a better memory than I have.
http://www.gather.com/viewArticle.action?articleId=281474977718294
http://www.gather.com/viewArticle.action?articleId=281474977718310

If you are interested in coming with me on future endeavors, I get the ideas from this great website. They have overnight excursions, haunted tours, conferences, and other events. Take a look and let me know if you want to go! Visit http://www.prairieghosts.com/
Later Dayz,

Steph

The Plague

I think a plague has swept through my family. Since Wednesday, I have been sick with the stomach flu and it horrendously sucks. Today hasn't been as bad as the other days but I can't eat much still (which, on a positive note, has resulted in me losing 5 lbs in 4 days). I tried to be productive today and start cleaning out the garage for my birthday party next weekend but once I got inside I couldn't hold a glass of water because both of my arms were shaking so bad....weird? I started laughing at myself because what else could I do except wallow in self pity or laugh? So I started seeing how much water I could hold without spilling for entertainment. I have not been out of the house much except to mull around the yard a bit for the past three days. Cabin fever will start to take hold and soon you will find me huddled in a corner with my shaking hands.......nice thought.
My brother and dad both have fevers, my grandma was in the hospital for a bit this morning with flu-like symptoms, and numerous cousins have it or are just getting over it. I hate this. I hate this. I hate this. I want food to taste good again and want to be able to go farther than my driveway. I've started to make plans for next week in hopes that this illness will leave. I do have a new-found love for Canada Dry Ginger Ale that seems to calm down my stomach. I'm pretty healthy most of the time and haven't been this sick in a LONG time so it just seems to literally STOP my life and I hate my life to stop with something I can't control. But that is just it...just keep taking the medicine, resting, drinking the liquids, etc. is what is in my power to do so I guess there's no use complaining much more about it.....and keep laughing at my shakiness. I just want this to go away.........
Steph

All Good Things Must Come To An End

I know that nothing lives forever (materially anyway), but it's hard not to think that they do. You think the job you have and that you've had for so long will never go away until one day after 20-some years, they pop into your office with a pink slip. The television show that kept you glued to the tv one night a week with new seasons and episodes will come to an end (with a hopefully good conclusion instead of a dreaded cancellation that leaves you hanging). The book series that kept your nose in the book will have its last written word (R.I.P. Harry Potter!). I'm okay with things coming to an end as long as their ending is dignified and not stolen from them. I can accept changes that must occur and are probably a good thing. So things like retirement, or quitting a job (when they are on your terms), or a television show whose contracts are up, or graduating, or moving, or finishing a series of books........but I was upset on Friday when I woke up at 9am to hear that the Kathy & Judy Radio Show on 720AM -- WGN was cancelled -- suddenly and without warning. The day they announced it at 9am was the last broadcast. It was a shock not only to their audience but also other radio hosts throughout the day that knew nothing of this.

I know it was a radio talk show and some people might think I'm a bit too sentimental to get too worked up over this, but this is what I know. I know that these two women had been on from 9am-12pm on WGN radio for over 20 years and at the time of the cancellation, still had 9 months left on their contract. Being both in their 60's now, it was safe to assume that after these 9 months, they would not renew their contract and would have retired. My parents listened to these women and I use to groan when they turned them on because I felt radio was only good for the music until the day I had my own car. No good song was on and I tuned in and listened to the entire broadcast. In those three hours, these 2 women could me me laugh, entertain me, inform me, and open my mind. Since then, on my way to work or school in the morning, I would turn to the station and learn something new. They had "speak your peace" where callers had 30 seconds to gripe about anything, Sex Thursday talks, serious discussion, funny discussion, and the list goes on. They encouraged callers and had such a charisma with each other that you couldn't help but want to be a "girlfriend" (what they called their listeners). They did not deserve this sudden drop. Their last broadcast was a recollection of their best times but it felt too short....unprepared. If they could have finished up their broadcast at the end of their last 9 months, there would have been no surprises. The end would be smooth and full of celebration and best of all....dignified. This move on WGN was shameful and disgraceful and....although I'll probably regret this later because this is usually not me....but deep down I'm hoping that whatever they are replacing them with or whatever new strategy they have (their reasoning for doing this) crashes and burns.....
Sorry this post was kinda negative.....on a good note, I feel a storm coming on....I love storms...
Later Dayz,
Stephanie

Don't Dip the Sandals in the Lemonade

If you are wondering about the title of this blog, the two images I think of when summer is mentioned are flip flops and a tall, iced glass of lemonade. This is my first week of having no work. I'm liking it now but I know by next week, unless I get busy fast, I'm gonna hate it. I like work and the satisfaction it gives me and the routine I have. No, that does not mean I'm totally against spontaneity (in fact, it is a must), but I like knowing what my next day is going to be like -- at least on outline of what it is going to be like. I'm a planner...and I like plans. Summer jobs have dramatically dropped off and it shows in the classifieds with very few jobs (much less summer jobs) to choose from. I do mow a lawn for $30 a week, will do a rare fill-in at the Mary Kay office, and will pray that my textbooks will sell on Half.com (I've sold one!!). I have saved up a good amount of money in case this summer was a jobless summer that would let me travel and bit and maybe work on some personal growth. I've already started this week with summer plans:

• I cleaned out the room, brought up the summer clothes, tied up loose ends at work, and caught up on emails, got my car fixed ($675 later for full brake replacement...ugh), almost got graduation cards mailed out, mom's birthday.....and all that jazz
• Became the designated house cleaner since my parents do not charge me rent or make me buy groceries. If I'm not rushing off to work, I better make this house my work, so I make sure to pick up, vaccuum, and unload/reload dishwasher each day among other little things so show my appreciation

And I've started filling up the calendar with events, travel, and things that I hope to cross off my life list or continue things that I have started and quit:

1. I am heading to Decatur, IL with my friend Emily to attend a Haunting Conference. I'm so lucky to have a friend that is as much into haunted places and the paranormal as I am. We are staying two days, taking a haunted tour, participating in a seance, and meeting some haunted book authors!
2. Las Vegas Here I Come -- and you thought I wasn't spontaneous enough! Within two days of being invited by my friend Traci, I had my flight booked. Do I know what we are going to do? Nope. Where we are staying? Nope. But I'm excited!
3. Weddings -- One in July and one in August of an old roommate and a co-worker of mine which leads me to....
4. Getting in shape!! I have started and quit so many times and I always have the excuse of not having enough time....NO MORE! I've been doing pretty good actually. The bad thing is I walked a lot at work and didn't have much time to eat a lot and that might pose a problem.
5. Turning 23!! On June 13th
6. Cooking -- I am forcing myself to learn to cook meals and be better....this will be tough because I do not find cooking enjoyable yet but hopefully I will get motivated....I need to watch Ratatouille....that always gets me motivated
7. GNO -- Otherwise known as the Girls Night Out that me, my mom, and my aunt have traditionally done for the past four years. We take 3 or four days and head to different places....Shippsewana, IN (Amish country), Galena, Gurnee, etc.
   
8. Horseback Riding -- My life list has learning to gallop and canter a horse. Found a stable at a reasonable price. Will go there the 1st week of June and sign up!
9. READING -- Have wanted to read all the classics that have never made it into my hands. Oh, and I've started a Book Club. Wanted to follow through with that as well
10. Scrapbook and writing -- starting with keeping up this blog and starting to turn the pictures and cards and letters and ticket stubs into something that isn't a pile or a box.
11. Love -- don't want to touch this one too much....I know what the situation is....It's in a very uncertain zone right now and I'm afraid to push it one way or another just yet....so having a bit of faith that circumstances will change somehow before summer is up

Pheww.....wow.....let summer begin!
Steph

Where Have All The Signs Gone?

It is getting nearer and nearer to the end of my first year as an event coordinator. I'm technically a graduate assistant meaning my pay is really crappy but I do get my grad school paid for. I actually really enjoy my job, am learning more and more, getting more responsibility, and love the people I work with. The bad news is that this position is not a summer position, so from May 18th to August 31st, I am unemployed and am not taking any classes. So from going to being really really busy to having nothing......is going to be a change and it's making me a little nervous. I have some summer plans including a couple weddings, two small road trips, my birthday (23!), a concert, etc. But I really do not like the prospect of being unemployed -- I feel so....unaccomplished...lazy...bored. And I like having a schedule. I'm not the free-spirited person that I wish I was (I'm so envious of you people) who can get up with no particular plans and have the best day. My internship and job searches have yielded nothing so far but now that my graduate class is over as of this week, I can devote more time to it.

I do have enough money saved up to get by for the next three months, but somehow I want this summer to be different. I recently read a book called "When They Were 22...." It is a collection of very short biographies (a page or two) about famous people (singers, authors, actors, Noble Prize Winners) and how their life changed when they were 22. I feel as if this job and other factors in my life have changed me in the past year -- I feel older, more independent, and growing into my own. Not saying I still have a lot to learn and a lot to experience. But I feel like this summer should be different. I'm hoping for a sign because my future seems so unclear right now -- but maybe I need the break from the university (among other things......) to stretch myself a bit. Sometimes I feel like my life is too small..........like the town I grew up in....

Where's My Bro-mance?

I just got done watching an episode of "House" on Fox tonight and had to blog about this. I love the "bro-mance" (a recent term where the relationship between to men can go beyond the high-fives to an actual deep relationship without one wanting to jump into bed with the other) between House and Wilson on this series -- in fact, I'm downright jealous of it. They bounce off one another, banter back and forth, can dish it back as easily as they can receive it, anticipate each other's moves and motives, pull the pranks, show up at each other's doorstep in the early AM and can be flat-out honest with each other. The synergy between these two is amazing to watch and can be just as envious. I know this is a television show with writers manipulating the characters and their relationships with each other to their whims but that doesn't deter the jealousy much. I can't remember a time in my life where I was "that" close to anyone and I think to have that kind of person in your life would be truly comforting. You wouldn't be embarrassed to call them at 3am or burst into tears in front of them or be afraid to call them out on something. I do have many great people in my life who I love to be around and maybe......... someday, some of those relationships will go deeper than I could imagine and I can have a sis-mance of my own. Haha....bro-mance does sound better, doesn't it? Until next time!

Get Out the Bats and Gloves

Every day I drive past this small town which houses an area of three baseball diamonds. And from now until the middle of summer, when I drive past I will always see either a baseball practice or game happening. I love it because the sport of baseball is something that is sentimental to me. It was a part of my childhood since I started playing softball in the 4th grade and continued until my last year in high school. There's just something about playing on the summer nights.....its starting to cool off from the hot day, the endless supply of gatorade bottles line the bench, and it's much less political than high school sports. I miss it and watching those kids play as I drive by makes me miss it more. There are memories there of games and teammates and after-game ice cream runs and practices and the coaches that meant more to you than you know. I want to get out of my car and tell those kids to let loose and not worry and enjoy every game and not let one bad moment ruin their entire game because sooner than later you become the person driving by and reminiscing. And hopefully one day, I can be my kid's coach or at least the parent dragging around my fold-up chair and extra gatorade bottle. I will revel in those days. I

Things I Learned at the South Side Irish Parade

For those of you who don't know what the South Side Irish Parade is, let me fill you in. The Sunday before St. Patrick's Day is designated as the South Side Irish Parade that takes place down Western Avenue on the South Side of Chicago. It consists of a parade featuring all things Irish including kilted-men playing bagpipes, curly-haired Irish dancers, and lots of knitted Aran sweaters and there is lots and LOTS of green. Plus, it is about the only day and place where you can witness a parent pulling their child in those little red wagons along with a 24 pack of beer. And this is the one day that it is absolutely OK to drink in the morning, afternoon, and night. So in the Irish spirit, let me share with you what I've learned from being a part of this momentous event.

1. Wear Green -- there are boas and hats and shirts and tuxedos.....get in the spirit!
2. If you are taking the train, get in the first or last car -- everyone congregates in the middle
3. Even if you aren't Irish, you are allowed to be and say that you are on this day
4. If you are a Cubs fan, be a Cubs fan on the inside -- you are on the South Side.....
5. Wear comfortable shoes -- You will walk (or stumble or crawl..) everywhere!
6. Be an excellent maneuverer -- the crowds at this parade and at the bars are worse than Black Friday shopping
7. Tip the bartender -- they are working their butt off...show some appreciation
8. Apologize and Forgive -- If you spill your drink on someone or bump into them or anything that could start a fight...apologize and offer amends. The battle or fight isn't worth it and the most people usually get is some blood splatters, bruises, and get thrown out of the bar that they just paid a $10 cover to get into. And if you are the person who gets bumped into or spilt on, ...forgive and move on. Another way to put it -- If you are a mean drunk, don't bother coming.
9. Do watch some of the parade -- the Irish dancers are fun to watch and the bagpipe players really show off the Irish culture with music
10. Meet People! Everyone around you is most likely there for the same reason you are....to celebrate and have a good time. Talk to people. Laugh with them. Drink with them. They are your best friends for that day. Be joyful and be happy.

I'd Rather Fight With You...

Valentine's Day is approaching sooner than later. As a single girl, I will battle the onslaught of depressive and lonely thoughts that attempt to weave its way into my mind. But on this day, maybe I'll try to celebrate the fact of love itself, and that it is out there and it causes great things to happen to people, between people, and among people. And what celebrates the many different kinds of love than the portrayal of it in movies. Romantic movies have kept women's dreams alive that they will find their match, or the man they are dishing on will finally take a hint and make a move, or the troubled relationships will work through the rough spots. So here is a tribute to some of my favorite romantic quotes in Cinema. So get ready for some lov'n!



Movie Quotes Baby! My Fave!

"I'd rather fight with you than make love to anyone else" -- The Wedding Date

I came here tonight because when you realize you want to spend the rest of your life with somebody, you want the rest of your life to start as soon as possible." -- When Harry Met Sally

"I love that you get cold when it's seventy degrees out. I love that it takes you an hour and a half to order a sandwich. I love that you get a little crinkle above your nose when you're looking at me like I'm nuts. I love that after I spend a day with you I can still smell your perfume on my clothes, and I love that you are the last person I want to talk to before I go to sleep at night."
-- When Harry Met Sally

"I am just a girl standing in front of a boy asking him to love her." -- Notting Hill

There are only four questions of value in life. What is sacred? Of what is the spirit made of? What is worth living for? What is worth dying for? The answer to each is the same. Only love."
-- Don Juan DeMarco

"I know what it is not to feel like your in the room until he looks at you or touches your hand or even makes a joke at your expense, just to let everyone know... you're with him. You're his." -- P.S. I Love You

"If you can promise me anything, promise me that whenever you're sad, or unsure, or you lose complete faith, that you'll try to see yourself through my eyes. Thank you for the honor of being my wife. I'm a man with no regrets. How lucky am I. You made my life, Holly. But I'm just one chapter in yours. There'll be more. I promise. So here it comes, the big one. Don't be afraid to fall in love again. Watch out for that signal, when life as you know it ends." -- P.S. I Love You

"Here's looking at you kid." -- Casablanca

"What is it you want, Mary? What do you want? You want the moon? Just say the word and I'll throw a lasso around it and pull it down. Hey. That's a pretty good idea. I'll give you the moon, Mary." -- It's a Wonderful Life

"I'm going to miss your lips and everything attached to them." -- Elizabethtown

"Just tell me you love me and get it over with!" -- Elizabethtown

"Kim: It must have been awful when they told you whose house it was.
Edward: I knew it was Jim's house.
Kim: You... you did?
Edward: Yes.
Kim: ...Well, then why'd you do it?
Edward: Because you asked me to." -- Edward Scissorhands

"Iris, if you were a melody... I used only the good notes." -- The Holiday

"These years that I have been in love have been the darkest days of my life. All because I've been cursed by being in love with a man who does not and will not love me back...........And sometimes you can even convince yourself that he'll see the light and show up at your door. And after all that, however long all that may be, you'll go somewhere new. And you'll meet people who make you feel worthwhile again. And little pieces of your soul will finally come back. And all that fuzzy stuff, those years of your life that you wasted, that will eventually begin to fade." -- The Holiday (because sometimes love means to let go and look ahead)

"Bridget: Wait a minute... nice boys don't kiss like that.
Mark Darcy: Oh, yes, they fucking do." -- Bridget Jones Diary

"No. I like you very much. Just as you are." -- Bridget Jones Diary

"Sometimes I miss you so much I can hardly stand it. I wish I knew how to quit you." -- Brokeback Mountain

"I will not leave Cold Mountain. My last thread of courage is to wait... for you." -- Cold Mountain

" I love you more than all the words in all the books in all the world. " -- Why Did I Get Married

"Ever Mine. Every Thine. Ever Ours." -- Sex and The City

"Look, in my opinion, the best thing you can do is find a person who loves you for exactly what you are. Good mood, bad mood, ugly, pretty, handsome, what have you, the right person is still going to think the sun shines out your ass. That's the kind of person that's worth sticking with." -- Juno

"We need a witness to our lives. There's a billion people on the planet... I mean, what does any one life really mean? But in a marriage, you're promising to care about everything. The good things, the bad things, the terrible things, the mundane things... all of it, all of the time, every day. You're saying 'Your life will not go unnoticed because I will notice it. Your life will not go un-witnessed because I will be your witness'." -- Shall We Dance

"What a pain in the ass you are. And it's true: you're not young, you're not new, and you do make people laugh. And me? I'm still with you because you make me laugh. So you know what I got to do? I got to sell my plot in Key Biscayne so I can get one next to you in that shithole Los Copa, so I never miss a laugh." -- The Birdcage

"They say when you meet the love of your life, time stops. And that's true." -- Big Fish

"Sandra Templeton....I love you and I will marry you!" -- Big Fish

"We saved each other." -- Nights in Rodanthe

Wow, that was a lot. You probably knew a few of these and maybe some that you didn't. These were moments in the movie that I stopped and thought "wow, I never thought of it like that" or "Awww..." or it was a moment in the movie that stuck with me or resinated through me even after I've turned the movie off. Credit to amazing writers who give us hope. And hope is a good thing. Until next time!
Steph

It Really is a Small World....

So after spending five years on my university's campus as an undergrad and now working there while obtaining my grad degree, I didn't think that my home life had any connection to the university. I went there knowing no one -- students or faculty -- and many had never even heard of my town.....until today. Today I found out that a teacher, who had a meeting with a co-worker of mine, knew that small town of mine. In fact, her father had taught at that school -- had taught me. He was one of my favorite, most memorable teachers in school. After he retired when I was in high school, I found out that his young granddaughter contracted a rare illness and died very suddenly. Although I didn't know the family personally, I still remember her name and how upset I was that something so tragic could happen to someone so young and happen to the granddaughter of someone who was so genuine and had such a down-to-earth enlightened view of life. That really stuck with me......so here comes the revelation that had eluded me for the past five years. On my campus is a tree. I have past this tree so many times without a second glance but I don't think I can do that anymore. I found out today that this particular tree was dedicated to the memory of that little girl. I guess it really is a small world and we are all just a a couple connections away from each other. And, honestly, I don't think I'd want it any other way.
Until Next Time......

You Need To Go....

This past weekend, I went to a wake. I have always felt an obligation to go to wakes, even if I only knew a surviving family member, and I now stand firm in that you should, if at all possible, attend them. I really did not know the man who died. He was the father of my uncle and I remember very little about him except a few snippets from when I was a kid. My parents debated whether we should drive the hour and a half to go but I felt that we needed to be there....and I was right. As much as I wanted to be there to pay my respects to the man who had died, I especially wanted to be there for my uncle, who just lost his father, and my aunt, who lost her father-in-law, and my younger cousins, who have lost their grandpa. It is just as important to be there for the people who are still living as it is for the person who died. And it seems I am not the only person who feels this way because after I hugged my uncle and saw his tears and felt my own tears, he said something that will always stay with me. He said "it is times like this where you find out who really loves you."

So even if you feel uncomfortable and are debating whether to make the trip.......make the trip. You have no idea how much just showing up will mean to that surviving person. And even if you can't quite find the right words to say and all that comes out is a meager "I'm sorry" and a hug, that is really all it takes. Because everything else that you may have wanted to say or that you believe should have been said is being said. It is being said by your presence there. By showing up, you are saying "I'm here because I love you and I want to help honor the life of someone you love. You are important to me and your pain and sorrow are mine as well. I will always be here for you." It doesn't need to be spoken. In fact, sometimes it is the silence and the "just knowing" that makes the bond even stronger. So just be there. You never know what an impact you may have.
Until Next Time!

Stephanie