You Need To Go....

This past weekend, I went to a wake. I have always felt an obligation to go to wakes, even if I only knew a surviving family member, and I now stand firm in that you should, if at all possible, attend them. I really did not know the man who died. He was the father of my uncle and I remember very little about him except a few snippets from when I was a kid. My parents debated whether we should drive the hour and a half to go but I felt that we needed to be there....and I was right. As much as I wanted to be there to pay my respects to the man who had died, I especially wanted to be there for my uncle, who just lost his father, and my aunt, who lost her father-in-law, and my younger cousins, who have lost their grandpa. It is just as important to be there for the people who are still living as it is for the person who died. And it seems I am not the only person who feels this way because after I hugged my uncle and saw his tears and felt my own tears, he said something that will always stay with me. He said "it is times like this where you find out who really loves you."

So even if you feel uncomfortable and are debating whether to make the trip.......make the trip. You have no idea how much just showing up will mean to that surviving person. And even if you can't quite find the right words to say and all that comes out is a meager "I'm sorry" and a hug, that is really all it takes. Because everything else that you may have wanted to say or that you believe should have been said is being said. It is being said by your presence there. By showing up, you are saying "I'm here because I love you and I want to help honor the life of someone you love. You are important to me and your pain and sorrow are mine as well. I will always be here for you." It doesn't need to be spoken. In fact, sometimes it is the silence and the "just knowing" that makes the bond even stronger. So just be there. You never know what an impact you may have.
Until Next Time!

Stephanie

The New Loves

So 2008 definitely brought some new loves into my life. Let me count the ways.....

1. Trying out new restaurants -- So the picky, only-want-to-eat-at-this-or-that-place person has turned a 180. I now love discovering new places and trying new foods and taking in the new atmospheres. Among the little treasures I have found include Obee's in Ottawa, Savannah's in Sandwich, Eastern Europe in Romeoville, and The Cove in Morris.

2. Winchester Chimes -- the tune takes me back to my grandma's huge, old house where the clock (which took up half of the wall) chimed the same tune on the hour. That house was my heaven until my grandparents decided to move into something smaller and sold it in 2004. I never knew what the chime was until I was in a small resale shop and heard it again. There on a shelf, was a small clock that chimed the same tune. The clock now sits on my shelf.

3. Chess -- a game that before this year I had given up even attempting to learn. But with a little patience on the part of a couple of good friends, I have a new-found love for the classic game of war. Mind-warping, extremely frustrating at times, but by the end, you will probably find me smiling. Plus, there's nothing wrong with exercising the brain a bit with strategically planning your moves and anticipating your opponents. #1 Plan: Don't Die.

4. Over Easy Eggs -- Was always a scrambled eggs girl until I found the delicious combo of dipping my toast into the runny yolk of the egg. Um, orgasm in my mouth!

5. Wrapping Christmas Presents -- after years of crappy wrapping, I finally have straighter edges (not perfect....cutting is not my fortay), nice folds, curly ribbons, and not so much tape. I applaud myself this year!

6. Batman -- I have always been a Batman-loving girl before people even thought about "Batman Begins" or the "Dark Knight." After riding the bus home from school, Batman: The Animated Series was on at 4pm and I did not miss it as a grade-schooler. So, imagine my glee at finding out the entire series was released on DVD seasons. Throughout 2008, I purchased them and now own all of the seasons.

7. Sherlock Holmes -- Always knew who he was and what he did but never really delved into his world. I'm loving Sir Arthur Doyle's much aclaimed character and his historic adventures.

8. Tic Tac Chill Mints -- they are my addiction -- my cocaine.

9. Thin Mint Shots -- Peppermint Snaupps with a bit of chocolate syrup and you have a delightful new shot with all of its alcoholy-goodness.

10. "Homework" -- No, not the school kind. I learned about doing your "homework" from Scott Smith who runs a "Motivation to Move" website and also has a "Daily Boost" podcast that I listen to. His idea of "homework" is to sit down once a week and just reflect on your life -- where you are at, who you are, what you value, where you want to go, who you want to be, and what kinds of things you do to get there. You just jot this stuff down and answer the question -- am I where I want to be? Am I who I want to be? You may just jot down some stuff you want to improve on or do in the coming week. Self-reflection is a good thing.

11. Podcasts -- I had an iPod for 2 years before I discovered what podcasts were. These free audio and video "casts" have enough subjects for everybody. I have subscribed to the "Kathy and Judy" podcast which plays highlights from their popular radio show, a podcast to teach me spanish, one to show me how the play the piano, one that has interviews with paranormal researchers, and one that plays Joel Osteen's preaching. Variety right? With thousands of podcasts, you can find what you are looking for.

12. Work -- No matter what the work is, if you have awesome people working alongside you, you will love your job. That's my theory. Tested and proved.

13. Flossing -- my whole mouth just feels cleaner afterward

14. A Bit of Faith -- Believing that everything happens for a reason. I happened upon the concept while an undergrad in college but I have fully grasped it and am holding on tight.